It's me, only much better

It's not hard to see that I am in a better place than where I was, say four or five years ago. But to be honest, I don't notice it much anymore. It's just become my life. Well, it's me, only better.

I spent the first 12 years of my adult life with one man. And it's hard for me to remember now being happy during those 12 years with him. I don't say that as a jilted divorced woman with an axe to grind. Not in the least. No axes, here. No vendettas. He's who he is, and I am who I am. Those two people just stopped fitting together.

When that was over, life was hard, until I met the man I was truly meant to spend the rest of my life with. It wasn't hard for anyone to notice. Even my son, who was a mere 8 years old and who was having his own issues dealing with a divorce, remarked, "Mom, Henry makes you smile. You haven't smiled in a long time. You just cried." Pretty deep words coming from a kid, and I knew what he meant. I wasn't me until I met Henry.

Dear Friend reminded me of that tonight as we strolled through town. We chatted about the latest news, and I told her my ex was getting remarried. I told her, "It's no big deal. I've been better off for a long time now." She remarked, "Yes. You're totally different." She's said this to me before, and I know what she means. I value her opinion, and understand her truths. I know who I was then, and I know who I am now, and I know where the credit for that recovery goes. There is a man who makes me truly happy. Who makes me laugh, smile and enjoy my life again.

I don't think about it much anymore because it has become normal for me to be happy. That's a good thing. I've accepted my divorce and all that came with it, the good and the bad. I'm not happy I've been divorced. I mean, who is? But I've come so far ...

Really, I'm still me, but with Henry, I'm much better.

Marking my soul

Divorce is hard. Well, to be quite frank, it was downright awful. When it was over, I never wanted anything to do with marriage ever again. Most likely, I feared it would end in divorce -- just like the last did. Fear takes a toll on your heart and mind.

In walked Henry. His smile was contagious. His eyes were mesmerizing. His background was enchanting. I wanted to know more. I wanted to be his friend. Travel through a first date, tears, discussions and a lot of growing pains, but even more lovely minutes, and we'll be celebrating our first wedding anniversary on Nov. 8.

He's an amazing man. I am glad he took my fear, wadded it up in a ball and threw it away. He's genuine, honest, loving and dedicated. When he touches me, I want to curl up in his arms and hide there forever. When he flashes a smile my way, I want to get lost in that grin that can make anyone happy again.

I found my soulmate. Of that, there's no doubt. No one gets me like Henry. No one has ever loved me the way he does. No one makes me laugh like Henry. We can do anything together and have fun. We spend time together, and thoroughly enjoy that time with each other.

He's an amazing man, and I am a lucky gal because he walked into my life that chilly February evening. The fear is gone. He's my protector, supporter, rock and true love. He accepts me for who I am. No one has ever done that. To him, I am perfect. To me, he's better than perfect.

For the first time in my life, I am truly happy with my life because of the special people, like Henry, who have marked my soul.